Tuesday, August 30, 2005

What can I say?

  • When the city in which I was born, New Orleans, is underwater?
  • When there are bodies floating in the streets in some areas?
  • When the water is continuing to pour into the city even now, so flood levels are still rising?
  • When my sister, The Mysterious Lubba D, and my sister-in-law may have lost everything? They will definitely be without a place to live.
  • When my girlfriend's parents may have lost everything also?
  • When everyone I know from the entire area is facing the same circumstances?
  • When communications with anyone in the area is impossible and people that you know are unaccounted for?
  • When the city that I grew up in is so horrendously damaged?

Please, help the victims of hurricane Katrina by donating using either one of the links on the right.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

We will overcome.

Saturday I posted about the new flag button. Sunday I found out how to remove it. This little snippet of code was donated by regular No Timer, Digitalicat, who is amazing when it comes to code. He also has a wonderful way with words and one of my favorite weblogs. Go check him out here.

To remove the flag button, use the following code:

#flagButton {display:none !important;}


between the style tags. I placed it in my code here:

Designer: Douglas Bowman
URL: www.stopdesign.com
Date: 26 Feb 2004
----------------------------------------------- */

#flagButton {display:none !important;}

body {


I highly encourage everyone to do this, even if I totally disagree with all of your views and think you should be shot bare-assed from a cannon, because who am I to say what someone else can post? I just won't read you.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

Blogger question and Canine Hijinks

Blog Template Question:

Does anyone know how to remove the little bar with the next blog button from the top of my blog? I know that it is located within the <$BlogMetaData$> tag, but I don't know how to get rid of just the bar itself. Since the idiots at Blogger decided to add the "flag" option, I can't leave it up there because I don't believe in censorship. Basically, if enough people click the flag button, Blogger will make your blog unlisted. Since I've only got 3 regular readers to begin with, I don't need Blogger making my life harder because a bunch of people with broomsticks deep in their asses and some conservatives (ok, I guess that's really just a subset of people with broomsticks deep in their asses) didn't like my blog. They don't have to read it, that's what the "Next Blog" button is for. Anyway, if anyone can tell me how to remove the bar from my blog, I'd greatly appreciate it.

And now:

Canine Hijinks:

"Beedogs.com is the premier online repository for pictures of dogs in bee costumes." Enjoy.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Today's Post

Yeah, screw that.

Official Proclamation #175


I proclaim "No Time For Later" to be a blog that has some poetry in it.

I don't feel like writing poetry today.

When we were kids, we used to do interesting things to each other, some of which I will describe here, but none of which I actually expect anyone else to understand or even find amusing.

The first of these things was "Flounder." As a kid, I discovered dead weight and decided to use it to my advantage. Picture the following: You're completely engrossed in something that takes all of your concentration. You're still a kid, so you're pretty weak. You have a mischievous brother who looks upon moments in which you're completely engrossed and concentrating as golden moments of opportunity. Your brother sits down next to you, eyes you sideways, leans away from you and tilts his head towards you. He sits there like that for several seconds, knowing that you're engrossed and do not see his warning posture. Suddenly he bursts into the air, yelling "FLOUNDER!!!!!!", and allows himself to fall on top of you sideways where he remains completely limp and nothing but dead weight. This is known as "Flounder."

The second and more popular thing I will relate today is "Muff." I have to give credit to The Mysterious Lubba D for coming up with this gem. There aren't many minds out there that are twisted enough to come up with something like this, but as evidenced by The Great Play-Doh Incident of 1978, my sisters' mind is. "Muff" is best performed on an unsuspecting victim. In fact, "Muff" should only be performed on an unsuspecting victim or your chances of successfully completing a "Muff" are diminished greatly. Generally, the best time to "Muff" someone is during your regularly scheduled television programming. To perfom a "Muff," you'll need a pillow and a sofa. The pillow must be a decorative, fairly hard (as pillows go) pillow, generally found on sofas and couches. The key point of using such a pillow is that it is small and hard. Second, you must be sitting next to your victim on a couch or sofa (as only this type of furniture allows you to be in the proximity of the victim that you will need to be in), but the victim cannot know that you have the pillow in hand, so just having it in reach upon sitting down is usually the best idea. To perform the "Muff," wait until your victim is sufficiently zoned out on the television. Slowly, so as not to alert the victim that something is amiss, get a good firm grip on your pillow. Then, as if it were out of nowhere, gleefully yell "MUFF!!!!" and smack the victim as hard as you can in the face with your pillow. You must be mentally prepared, because there is no doubt a fight with your victim will ensue. It also helps if you are five years older than your victim because then your victim will not be able to get his revenge until much later in life. Usually your victim will have forgotten these things by then, and won't blog about it or anything, so don't worry about revenge.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Official Proclamation #68

From now on and from this day forth, I proclaim "No Time For Later" to be a poetry blog. Because such a proclamation must be given the proper respect and grandeur, and because it is inspired by two of my favorite bloggers (don't worry, if you read this nonsense, you're one of my favorite bloggers too. Even if you don't have a blog), I hereby dedicate this blog to Pops and SJ for their unconditional love for blog poetry. In honor of them both, I have composed the following verse. Enjoy:

When Pops writes his posts, he's incognito
He did share his sister's boobs with us though,
And just when I thought the fun would stop,
SJ taught us how to crap-chop.
There's no topic so sour that they'll coat it with sugar
At either Pops' Bucket or Give Me The Booger.

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Reposting of Love Poem #3

I love how you keep me in line.
the way you ensure I stay on the path.
I love how you make sure that I'm safe,
and that I am protected
on all sides.

I love how you speak to me.
You keep me in my boundaries.
I love how you allow me to have friends of my own kind
never interfering, or
showing envy.

I love how you dote on me.
You shear my wool coat before you take me out.
I love how proud of me you are
to hump me in front of the Americans.
I love you, Goatherd. Baa baa-aa!

A lot of people have been finding the original post through search variants of "love poem." It is #1 on Yahoo Creative Commons Search for "love poem." I should let all of these people know that this poem is in jest. It refers to this post on my other blog. I guess even in Iraq, love has no boundaries.

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Flowers and Cards and Harry Connick, Jr.

I'd like to take a moment to send a very special sentiment to one of my favorite bloggers, despite the slavery.

Get well soon, AJ!
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